2010!!

New years resolution... Sunday night blogging! Since I'm back in school and settled and my schedule currently allows me to do this, so I shall.

It's a new term, my last term... possibly ever in school. I'm definitely going through a quarter life crisis thing right now trying to figure the future all out. I have a path I'd like to take but its 99.5% impossible given the choices I've made over the past 5 years.

You would think that having the opportunity to pay an excessive amount of money each term to go to school and get the chance to write exams that say you've got the education to do the things I want to do would have better inspired me to not procrastinate, put others before myself or sleep less. The case is not this. I've had at least one serious excuse each term. Whether it has been a psychotic relationship, a new distraction in the form of a hobby, or someone I constantly want to be around, as much as I'll deny it, school has never been my number one priority. It came in a close 2nd but now I'm paying for it.

However, this is my last chance to fix it and fix it I shall. January means a new year, and 2010 feels like it will be a good one. I've got an amazing support team at home, a great group of friends to catch me when I fall and another amazing few that won't just catch me but will also teach me how to get back up. They'll even empty out a bag of cups for me in case I need to throw up and stick me in the Bacchus position when I've had too much.

It's not just school I need to work on. There are some other things that need to be addressed this year. I need to stop thinking people are going to abandon me when they get too close. Like what is that. If someone loves you, why would they leave you unless you make them. It's not normal behaviour. I want to get fit too. Not lose weight, or be overly skinny or a 00. It's not going to happen, I'm not 12 anymore. However, I think it's important for me to work on my self image and if this is what its going to take then yes I will gym 4 days a week and aquafit and skate and climb as much as I can. Finally I really need to learn I cannot change or control everything or every one. Just doesn't work like that.

There's a bunch of other stuff of course but those are the main things.

Something else new... instant update!

Favourite song currently: Blind - Ke$ha
Favourite piece of clothing: New Roots sweater
Last drink: Apple Juice
Work today: Yep
Currently craving: Red pepper and chicken nachos and mint chocolate bubble tea